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Five Things to Talk About on Your First Date

1) What’s the purpose of the relationship?
People go into a relationship for many reasons. For benefits, for fun, short term, long term, marriage, or open relationships. Some people want a mutual relationship. You should know the purpose before you go on a first date. Some people are willing to try after a failed or bad experience from a past relationship. Some men are afraid of marriage; some women want the marital home. Men are looking for an ambitious woman, not just someone who desires children packs their belongings and live with them. Some men wish to have short term relationships; they want to know you before they commit to anything of relevance in the future. Be okay with short term relationships; it’s a tricky answer. One easy way to overcome that is by asking, are you willing to commit to the long term after a short while? Boom, there goes your answer. Never be insecure about the other person, avoid calls and text messages on your first date. It says a lot about you. Bring a rose if possible. It goes for both parties.
Avoid texting, make it fun.

2)Talk about each other’s interests, likes, and dislikes. Love can be very challenging for two couples coming together from two different backgrounds and cultures. Love is beautiful when two people can feel the need to talk about it freely without the feeling of guilt or shame. Love is free from any pain or hurt. Love is shared, not given. What are the other partner’s likes, what do they dislike, what makes them upset, what makes the other person who they are? These are very important to express when two people come together to know themselves on the first date. Remember not to talk too much about your ex-partner. Remember to concentrate on both of you. A romantic dinner would be the right choice for a first date; that way, you could both stare in each other eyes, and you could both feel the trust and likeness of one’s background. Never question why the other partner dislikes what you like. Take it as it comes, and eventually, it will work itself out.

3) Know each other’s motivation, what keeps both of you going?
For most of us, our past relationships have been an experience, a lesson, or motivation. Your motivation is to share your experience with the other partner. Tell them why and what happened, and the reason you have decided to move on. Be honest, be sincere, and trust yourself enough to share your experiences; it doesn’t matter what the other person feels or thinks about you. What matters is who you are. Be open to questions and discussions. Remember not to exaggerate on your ex; the things you did for him or things he did for you. Remember, in this setting, at this moment; there is someone special than your ex. Remember to say thank you for the little says, a big smile after a truthful story won’t hurt. Have fun even during the most painful and exciting moments.

4)What are your goals, career, and vision?
From my personal experience, I have realized the mistakes I have made when on a particular dinner date with someone I like. I forget to mention the most crucial aspect of it. What’re their goals? Goals are essential regarding the type of woman or man you intend seeking. Character, self-discipline, and respect all play a part in this area. You know a person by what they do, what they financially make, and what kind of job they do. Someone’s looks can quickly motivate you, so how can you forget how important your surroundings should be. Remember, you are bringing someone around your home, your personal space, and your spiritual life. Do not forget their visions and intentions. Ask questions, even when they feel uncomfortable. A virtue man or woman knows her place, knows what she wants, and he or she is ready to move on to greater possibilities and a healthy relationship. You are in charge, be the boss. Bring a pen and a notepad if you would. Ask him to write anything he is thinking of or draw anything, you both got the time, use it. Be bold, and confident.

5) The family wants/ needs/ necessity.
When you go on a dinner date, you want to make sure your partner has a connection or tie with his/her family. Is he or she family-oriented? Does he/she want kids in the future, not a priority, just a question. With a kind of issue like that, you get all the answers you both desires. Remember not to judge the person’s past, or make it seem obvious you are not interested. First of all, you won’t waste all your time to be with someone, give them your time and ignore their past, would you? Remember to keep that beautiful smile, ask them what they enjoy on a family’s dinner, and what to expect. Do not forget to tell them how beautiful and wonderful they are. Having conservations like this would give you a sense of expectation. A kiss is welcomed but surely not needed. Do not shake hands, you can hold hands. A hug is a plus.
Smile and Make it worth the time.
Ruby Karyo.

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